Here’s a few ideas…

Thanks for sharing Peggy! 

A  Little Canadian Humour,  Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks. 

If you’re local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May,

You may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there,

You may live in Canada.  

If you’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time,

You may live in Canada. 

  If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number,

 You may live in Canada.

   If ’Vacation’ means going anywhere South of Detroit for the weekend,

You may live in Canada. 

 If you measure distance in hours,

You may live in Canada. 

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once?  You may live in Canada. 

 If you have switched from ‘heat’ to ’A/C’ in the same day and back again,

You may live in Canada. 

 If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching,

You may live in Canada. 

 If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked,

You may live in Canada. 

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, You may live in Canada.  

If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,

You may live in Canada. 

 If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km –You’re going 90 and everybody is passing you,

You may live in Canada. 

 If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow,

You may live in Canada.  

 If you know all 4 seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, You may live in Canada. 

 If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car,You may live in Canada. 

 If you find 2 degrees ‘a little chilly’,

You may live in Canada. 

If you actually understand these jokes, and tell them to all you’re Canadian friends & others,

You definitely live in Canada!
Thanks Carol!

Below are four (4 ) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them
instantly. You can’t take your time - answer all of them immediately.

First Question:You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person.
What position are you in?

 Second Question:
             If you overtake the last person, then you are…?

 Third Question:
   

 Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only .
 Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.

Now add 30.Add another 1000 .

Now add 20 . Now add another 1000

Now add 10 . What is the total?

The correct answer is actually 4100.

If you don’t believe it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you’ll get the last question right….
Maybe.

Fourth Question:

                          Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn’t.
Her name is Mary! Read the question again!

Okay, now the bonus round:

PLEASE TELL OTHERS AND KEEP THIS GOING TO FRUSTRATE THE
SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE

Thanks for the wisdom Sharon! 

Okay, so I am really dating myself but, I came across this article and laughed so hard I had to share…

MEMBERS OF TWISTED SISTER NOW WILLING TO TAKE IT

September 29, 2008, the Onion, Issue 44-40 

- From the Desk of David Pogue -

—————————————-

 

Tech Tips for the Basic Computer User

By DAVID POGUE

 

Last week, I wrote an entry on my blog

http://nytimes.com/pogue

that began like this:

 

“One of these days, I’m going to write a book called, ‘The

Basics.’ It’s going to be a compendium of the essential

tech bits that you just assume everyone knows–but you’re

wrong.

 

(I’ll never forget watching a book editor at a publishing

house painstakingly drag across a word in a word processor

to select it. After 10 minutes of this, I couldn’t stand

it. ‘Why don’t you just double-click the word?’ She had no

clue you could do that!)”

 

Many readers chimed in with other “basics” that they assumed

every computer user knew–but soon discovered that what’s

common knowledge isn’t the same as universal knowledge.

 

I’m sure the basics could fill a book, but here are a few to

get you started. All of these are things that certain

friends, family or coworkers, over the years, did *not*

know. Clip, save and pass along to…well, you know who they

are.

 

* You can double-click a word to highlight it in any

document, e-mail or Web page.

 

* When you get an e-mail message from eBay or your bank,

claiming that you have an account problem or a question

from a buyer, it’s probably a “phishing scam” intended to

trick you into typing your password. Don’t click the link

in the message. If in doubt, go into your browser and type

“www.ebay.com” (or whatever) manually.

 

* Nobody, but nobody, is going to give you half of $80

million to help them liberate the funds of a deceased

millionaire…from Nigeria or anywhere else.

 

* You can hide all windows, revealing only what’s on the

computer desktop, with one keystroke: Windows key+D in

Windows, F11 on Macs (or, on recent Mac laptops,

Command+F3; Command is the key with the cloverleaf logo).

That’s great when you want examine or delete something

you’ve just downloaded to the desktop, for example. Press

the keystroke again to return to what you were doing.

 

* You can enlarge the text on any Web page. In Windows,

press Ctrl and the plus or minus keys (for bigger or

smaller fonts); on the Mac, it’s the Command key and plus

or minus.

 

* You can also enlarge the entire Web page or document by

pressing the Control key as you turn the wheel on top of

your mouse. On the Mac, this enlarges the entire screen

image.

 

* The number of megapixels does not determine a camera’s

picture quality; that’s a marketing myth. The sensor size

is far more important. (Use Google to find it. For example,

search for “sensor size Nikon D90.”)

 

* On most cellphones, press the Send key to open up a list

of recent calls. Instead of manually dialing, you can

return a call by highlighting one of these calls and

pressing Send again.

 

* When someone sends you some shocking e-mail and suggests

that you pass it on, don’t. At least not until you’ve first

confirmed its truth at snopes.com, the Internet’s authority

on e-mailed myths. This includes get-rich schemes,

Microsoft/AOL cash giveaways, and–especially lately–nutty

scare-tactic messages about our Presidential candidates.

 

* You can tap the Space bar to scroll down on a Web page one

screenful. Add the Shift key to scroll back up.

 

* When you’re filling in the boxes on a Web page (like City,

State, Zip), you can press the Tab key to jump from box to

box, rather than clicking. Add the Shift key to jump

through the boxes backwards.

 

* You can adjust the size and position of any window on your

computer. Drag the top strip to move it; drag the

lower-right corner (Mac) or any edge (Windows) to resize

it.

 

* Forcing the camera’s flash to go off prevents silhouetted,

too-dark faces when you’re outdoors.

 

* When you’re searching for something on the Web using, say,

Google, put quotes around phrases that must be searched

together. For example, if you put quotes around “electric

curtains,” Google won’t waste your time finding one set of

Web pages containing the word “electric” and another set

containing the word “curtains.”

 

* You can use Google to do math for you. Just type the

equation, like 23*7+15/3=, and hit Enter.

 

* Oh, yeah: on the computer, * means “times” and / means

“divided by.”

 

* If you can’t find some obvious command, like Delete in a

photo program, try clicking using the right-side mouse

button. (On the Mac, you can Control-click instead.)

 

* Google is also a units-of-measurement and currency

converter. Type “teaspoons in 1.3 gallons,” for example, or

“euros in 17 dollars.” Click Search to see the answer.

 

* You can open the Start menu by tapping the key with the

Windows logo on it.

 

* You can switch from one open program to the next by

pressing Alt+Tab (Windows) or Command-Tab (Mac).

 

* You generally can’t send someone more than a couple of

full-size digital photos as an e-mail attachment; those

files are too big, and they’ll bounce back to you.

(Instead, use iPhone or Picasa–photo-organizing programs

that can automatically scale down photos in the process of

e-mailing them.)

 

* Whatever technology you buy today will be obsolete soon,

but you can avoid heartache by learning the cycles. New

iPods come out every September. New digital cameras come

out in February and October.

 

* Just putting something into the Trash or the Recycle Bin

doesn’t actually delete it. You then have to *empty* the

Trash or Recycle Bin. (Once a year, I hear about somebody

whose hard drive is full, despite having practically no

files. It’s because over the years, they’ve put 79

gigabytes’ worth of stuff in the Recycle Bin and never

emptied it.)

 

* You don’t have to type “http://www” into your Web browser.

Just type the remainder: “nytimes.com” or “dilbert.com,”

for example. (In the Safari browser, you can even leave off

the “.com” part.)

 

* On the iPhone, hit the Space bar twice at the end of a

sentence. You get a period, a space, and a capitalized

letter at the beginning of the next word.

 

* Come up with an automated backup system for your computer.

There’s no misery quite like the sick feeling of having

lost chunks of your life because you didn’t have a safety

copy.

 

 Thanks Judy!

What we can learn from nature!

Thanks Sharon!

Check this out. Apparently this is a real interview with a real senior government type talking about a real event that occurred on August 19th 2007 An oil tanker off the coast of Australia split in two, dumping 20,000 tons of crude oil into the ocean.

Senator Collins, a member of the Australian Parliament, appeared on a TV news program to reassure the Australian public after the disaster. This actual interview is so unbelievable, you’d swear it was a ‘Saturday Night Live’ or ‘Monty Python’ skit. But alas, its the real thing…

Thanks Peggy!